Holy shit, it’s already April?? It still feels like 2025. In fact, I just typed the date to this journal as 2025, which thinking back at it, I’ve done most of the time in the last journals I can remember.
Maybe
that’s the sign that things are good. Like, when you look back at something and
thing, “Yeah, those were the good old days,” you forget that you’re always in
the “good old days,” in some sense. That’s “basically” the mentality I had
going into Basic Training, except I knew those days were especially important.
“These are the good old days” was something I had written on my hydration pack,
which I wore everywhere. It was the mantra to my time there, and honestly? I
had so much fun. Basic training was probably the highlight of my military
career, or perhaps at least around the same as when things were good at the 1st
Engineer Battalion. Two different types of fun.
Reminiscing
that way makes me think that I am, actually, pretty happy right now. Usually,
when I neglect from my journals, it’s either because I’m busy or becoming
depressed. Not to say when I don’t write, I’m not happy, but it generally
doesn’t trend in the best direction if I’m not taking care of myself through my
writing. For instance, the aforementioned Basic Training story above? All had
incredibly detailed journals from that time. Perhaps some of the most
personally important writing I’ve ever done. If my kids, or my ancestors ever
read my writing, there’s a good chance they’ll start there. I’ve always wanted
to know what my ancestors were like. Maybe this would make it a good chance.
All that
is to say that I haven’t written a lot lately, and that’s not because of either
being busy (I’m amidst a micro-retirement), nor for being depressed (things are
pretty great, tbh). But let’s expand on
that “tbh” and break things down a bit. You know, to take inventory.
Let’s
start with the obvious – Japan. I’ve been here for about half a year now, and
every day is like a holiday. There’s a part of me missing if I’m not in a busy
city, and that part of me couldn’t be happier about being in literally the most
popular city in the world. No, I’m not counting Jakarta, because I don’t want
to. But being in the city has so many conveniences, especially when it’s
affordable for me to not have to pinch pennies. Like, just today, I had
eyedrops with actual antibiotics in them Uber’d to my apartment. How sick is
that?
I’ve also never eaten better food
on a more consistent basis. Just the other day, in Japanese class, I had to
compose a sentence about why I came to Japan using a verb form we had just
learned, and conveniently, I only comfortably knew how to say, “watashi wa
nihon ni tabete ni kimasu”, which means, “I came to Japan to eat.” That
couldn’t have been more true. I love the culture, I love the people, I love the
travel, and I love the city, but if I had to name one thing I look forward to
the most each day, it’s eating. I’ve never been more of a foodie as I am now.
It’s the fucking greatest.
And then there’s the people! One
thing I noticed right away about Japan is that the people are actually quite
like Midwesterners, which is the culture from my upbringing that I have taken
great pride in carrying forward. Midwesterners are good people who go out of
their way to help one another, and I’m consistently amazed at the lengths the
Japanese will go to help me on the day-to-day. Now, there are outliers
everywhere, but my observation about Japanese doesn’t change – the culture here
makes people act better towards others. I always say that the Japanese are so
nice, and while individual mileage may vary, I’ve experienced absolutely no
discrimination for being a foreigner, despite hearing what some are saying on
the news here about us.
And then there’s Japanese, the
language. I’ve been a full-time student at a language academy for a little over
two months now, and I’m seeing the fruits of my labour on a daily basis. I love
getting to talk to the delivery people, or ordering food, or reading random
signs as I trek around the city. My Japanese is terrible, but it’s still
heading in the right direction. It’s given me purpose to be here, specifically.
Learning how to live in Tokyo is, kind of, my job right now. Besides, when
people ask what I do, I don’t have to awkwardly stumble about how transitioning
out of the Army can be like. I can just say I’m a student.
But there’s one other major piece
of my “ikigai” right now. You know, your reason to live. It’s my book. I
finished the first draft about two months ago, and I’ll finish the second draft
in hopefully a week or two. And that’s a huge milestone! Because the first
draft is shit – you add so many things in periodically by the end of the first
draft, that the second draft is where you put in all these major missing plot
points. And towards the end of my second review, I’ve already passed the bulk
of my work needed to be done. The end is the relatively newest work, so it
needs the least done. Save the prologue, of course, but that’s more of a short
story in itself.
I’m so stoked about it though.
Regardless of if it does well, or if it’s just a milestone from an achievement
in my life, it’s a project I undertook that I’m proud of. And it digs deep.
Really, really deep. It honestly couldn’t go deeper, at least in a fictional
storytelling setting. But it’s a good story, too. At least, I think I’m prouder
of it than my last book. What’ll be really telling, though, is when the first
people who read it get back to me about it. The closed alpha, if you will.
That’s when others’ opinions will come in, which can be a bit intimidating,
regarding what it’s about it.
So, yeah, sorry I haven’t been
writing all that much, but if it’s any consolation, things are just peachy.
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